C'est La Vie, Baby

Before you Ignore this, Just give me one second..

Sat, 14 Jul 2012 14:04:00 -0400

I saw this photo today in the “Downloaded” Album on my phone..

It’s not that I need a picture to remind me that I miss you. Because I miss you everyday.

No one could ever make me nearly as mad as you do, and I’m sure the feeling is mutual, and that’s extremely toxic for a friendship, sure.. But we have history. We have the right formulas for a perfect friendship and you have to admit, for a while there… it was pretty golden.

I think back to “Xandy” days and I miss them. Honestly, I don’t even really know what happened and why we got so mad at each other or why I decided I would take the first step and just blow off everybody, including you. But knowing us and our history, it was probably over something really stupid.

But, you’re my best friend… You always have been. That night that you said was “torturous” was not only one of my favorite moments of us ever, it was also the moment when I felt like, the time we had lost never existed.

I miss you because you’re someone who is the complete opposite of me, yet is also the person that gets me the most. Mentally we’re ridiculously similar.. We’re stubborn, headstrong, and know how to put on a facade. But with the ability to put on a facade you always need that one friend that can see that, and for me that was you..

So, through all this, I’m not asking you to be my friend, I’ve taken more chances than I deserve. But I am asking for forgiveness, Because when we found each other, I promised I wouldn’t hurt you this time.. and I ended up hurting you. You hurt me too, but the difference was, You didn’t give up. I did. And I’m incredibly sorry about that…

I’m almost completely certain that you won’t want to forgive me, much less be my friend, since i know you actually deleted my number and took me off of skype. In fact this ridiculously old tumblr account was the only way i could think of being able to send this to you in hopes that you might actually see it..

I love you. Always have and always will.

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Sat, 10 Mar 2012 00:13:59 -0500

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